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Thursday, March 21, 2013

Hello, I'm Your Lifeline.

"My brother is on the floor by his bed, and I think he's dead!"

"There's someone outside, and they're trying to get in."

"What time is it?"

"Help me - I've been taken by a man in a truck!"

"My 8-year-old son will not go to school."

"We're at home, and my wife is about to give birth!"

"My chest is hurting, and I can barely breathe."

"My neighbor's shed is on fire, and it's about to catch the house!"

"There are aliens in my attic!"


There are certain lines of work that get under your skin, whether you want it to or not, and begin to run in your blood and change you, for better or worse.  And one of those lines of work is emergency services.  I used to work as a 911 dispatcher, and every. single. day. I am reminded of that job.  I am reminded of specific calls and incidents, of feelings that coursed through me as I answered the phone or the radio, of the people I worked with, of how I was changed by that job, and of how much I loved being a dispatcher.  Because I did love it.  With all my heart.  It took me forever to realize I loved it, and then once I  realized I loved it, the end of my time there was starting to come into sight.

Each of the lines written in the introduction were lines I heard when I answered 911.  I would answer the ringing line with "[town] 911; where is your emergency?" I waited with half-held breath for the reply.  Was this call going to be one that I dreaded, with an active shooter or someone needing CPR or a child that was kidnapped?  Sometimes I would internally breathe a sigh of relief as I began entering an already-occurred vehicle burglary call, and I would relax.  Other times, though, adrenaline would course through me as I began entering a high-priority call - an accident with injuries, a fire, a shooting, a burglary of a home in progress.

You only hear one end of the story.  You don't know everything that's going on.  And you try to picture in your head what is going on through snippets as the phone is handed from one person to another, or is placed down on a table as people scream and fight. The snippets come in even farther apart when a story unfolds over the radio.  "Uuuuuuugggghhh..." an officer moans over the radio, "I've been hit." Hit by what? A bullet? A person? A car? Other voices chime, "The vehicle is flipped over!"  "Fire..."  "We need JAWS now!"  You're so afraid that the officer is going to die, and you don't know exactly what happened.  You want to help, you want to rush to where you saw the officer's vehicle's GPS was on the map, but then you realize that you are helping by sending the fire trucks and ambulances and other officers.  The only other thing you can do is pray.  Only later do you learn the full story - a drunk driver hit the officer's vehicle and flipped it; the officer and passenger was trapped inside, and a fire started (but was quickly put out).  They all survived, but only by the grace of God.  Often, these stories end in death.

And sometimes the voices over the radio do tell of tragic endings.  Wildfires are spreading over the land, and your agency is working with other agencies, all teaming together to fight the fires.  There aren't enough men, aren't enough trucks.  Homes are being destroyed.  "There are supposed to be people in that trailer!" you hear someone from another agency cry out over the radio as he calls for more units to the location.  Twenty minutes later, there are confirmed dead in that trailer.  And a day later, you read in the news online about a dead mother and baby in a burned trailer, and you cry as you recall what you had heard on the radio.   You try not to imagine what happened inside that trailer, and you succeed, because you have built a wall around your mind that keeps that type of empathy out.

But then there are those times when you get to witness wonderful things, things like a husband helping his wife give birth to a healthy baby as he is coached over 911 on how to do it.  Things like officers stepping in to take another officer's report call when that officer had a rough day.  Things like firefighters volunteering to take the time to help an old lady with her fire alarms that just keep going off.  Things like a 911 caller calling back a day later to say "thank you" for helping him on the phone and "thank you" to the officer who took his report.  People's lives are saved, property is kept safe.  Children are found, and hysterical callers are calmed.  Suicides are prevented, violent men and women are locked up, and families are reconciled.

I had some really rough days. There was even a point where I started applying to other jobs.  But God gave me the strength to get through the hard times and the hard hours.  He pulled me through that point in time where I wanted to leave, and He showed me how much I had learned and how much satisfaction the job gave me.  And I realized I was in love with it.  I left because we had a baby and we moved, but I know one day I will go back to it.  I enjoyed helping the callers and the officers and firefighters more than I knew, and I enjoyed the occasional (ok, maybe a little more than occasional) rush of adrenaline that came with some of the calls.  I enjoyed the laughs shared at the crazy stories and people we encountered. And I enjoyed the camaraderie with my co-workers, both dispatchers and those out on the streets.  There is a strong bond between emergency services personnel that many of the public don't realize.  Maybe it's that way with other occupations, but it's different when your lives are in the hands of your co-workers and when you hold your co-workers' and others' lives in your own hands.  You have to trust, and think quickly, and get it right the first time.  Because whether you are an officer, a firefighter, or a dispatcher, you are a lifeline to someone, and you don't want to let them down.

Someday I will go back to it.  For now, though, I will enjoy the memories I have and the lessons I learned, and I will focus on what God wants me to do right now.  And I will always be kind to the 911 operator and to the officer pulling me over, because you never know what kind of day they had yesterday, are having today, or will have tomorrow.

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

The Untimely Death of a Never-Read Post

I had a lovely post all written out. I started editing some html, then went into the normal view, and Blogger kindly informed me that part of a tag was missing.

I hit save before I edited that tag, but while it was trying to save, I went back into the html view and somehow accidentally backspaced my whole post.

And then it saved.

And the last thing I had copied was a simple link.

*sigh* Maybe it was for good reason. I was talking about God in that post; perhaps some of my theology was off.  Or maybe (probably) it was just a simple mistake.

In either case, I unfortunately lost about 45 minutes of my time because of that terribly-timed save.

So, my prayer for the rest of this day: "Lord, do not let the rest of my time go to waste."

I usually hate clipart, but right now, I feel a kinship with it. I feel like this right now:



Maybe my prayer for the rest of the day really should be: "Lord, please help me control my anger toward non-animate objects that I'm placing the blame for human error on...and keep any destructive weapons like knives or axes away from me and my laptop..."

Amen.

Friday, March 1, 2013

Party Time!

I turned 24 years old today. 24! That's like...the hours in a day...so it's like I'm a day old? Excuse my weird rabbit trail. I got to choose where to go out to eat for lunch today with some folks I dearly love, so I chose Sahara, the Middle Eastern restaurant we have in town. Small, simply-decorated place, but DELICIOUS food. I love their chicken shawerma (sp?), and I tried babaganoush as well, and it was yummy. Shawerma is a vertical piece of seasoned meat on a grill...so put meat on a stick and hang it by a fire (or grill)...that's basically what it is. I think our chicken was seasoned with curry. It came in a piece of pita bread with a white garlic sauce and red onions sliced thin and seasoned with spices. SO yummy. Babaganoush is eggplant mashed up with tahini and served with pita bread for dipping. Also very yummy. I could eat this type of food every day. Their salads are super good, too. I absolutely love the Mediterranean diet. And tomorrow we're having a family birthday party with some relatives who are in from out of town. I got to choose the menu, as well: enchiladas verdes; bean, corn, and avocado salad; white queso and chips; Spanish rice; mandarin orange jello salad; and for dessert, black forest cake. We're also having Jarritos (Mexican soda) to drink. I've been craving authentic(ish) Mexican since we moved to the Midwest from Texas, but I've never had homemade Mexican food (outside of American-ized burritos and tacos and taco pie). So this will be very interesting and fun to make. Can you tell I love ethnic food? Give me any culture's ethnic food, and I will enjoy it and eat it eagerly. I've always been this way since I was little. I'll take sushi over fried fish, gyros over a burger, curried lentil soup over tomato soup and grilled cheese, lefse and lingonberries over crackers and peanut butter. I am off to sit with a content belly now...I could actually fall asleep. I feel so much better when I've eaten healthily than when I eat the typical SAD (standard American diet) food.

Monday, February 18, 2013

The Other Side of the Valley

"This is our valley" by indecent-lighting

The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake.
Even though I walk through 
the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil, for you are with me;
your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
Surely your goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
forever.  - Psalm 23, emphases mine

"The Lost Sheep"' by DouglasRamsey
Jordan and I have been walking through a valley. I actually wrote a bit about this last week.  He has not had a job for 6 months since he graduated college, and we hit what we considered to be rock bottom last Wednesday. You know, that moment when your bank account is negative, and you have no gas money, and your student loans are going to start repayment this month, and you have applied to many, many jobs and some interviews with no callbacks.  I opened up my computer and began applying to jobs myself, something that I wasn't previously going to consider since we have a baby girl who needs raising. We have been blessed to be allowed to live with my parents, so we have the basic necessities of shelter, food, and clothing. That's why I didn't consider our position to be absolute rock bottom...but it seemed pretty close, and it was compared to our history.

But God is oh-so-good, and His provision never fails.  The very next day following that bleak Wednesday when our situation seemed hopeless, on Thursday morning, Jordan got a call back from a company who offered him a position.  And they even accepted the pay rate Jordan requested!  Praise God!

God used this time to teach us many things: humility, dependence on God, faith in His promises, how to manage money wisely, the difference between "need" and "want."  And He has, once again, pulled us through the valley and led us to green pastures.  Oh, hallelujah!

I remember when
I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to you
And you raised me up again
My strength is almost gone
How can I carry on
If I can't find You

But as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away


And I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
And every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

-Casting Crowns, "Praise You in This Storm"

P.S. As I was writing this post, I just got a call for a job interview myself. And let's just say...the job fits what I'm looking for in one.  God is working!

Friday, February 15, 2013

Hope in Darkness

“The world is indeed full of peril and in it there are many dark places.
But still there is much that is fair. And though in all lands, love is now
mingled with grief, it still grows, perhaps, the greater.”  -J.R.R. Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings



Into the light by ~38DDmisswhiplash on deviantART
Coming Out of the Tunnel by `gilad on deviantART
Grief on the Loss of a Friend by *philneff on deviantART

Thursday, February 7, 2013

Looking for Life in Spring

It is raining out. Droplets of cold water are falling, falling, falling, onto the pure white snow covering the ground.  The crystalline snowflakes are losing their form and melting into bland water; 8 inches has melted into 7 inches and, by the end of the day, may be completely gone, leaving dark muddy naked dead ground behind.

I hate spring in the North (yes, I know it's not spring yet, but today is acting like a spring day). It tears the beautiful snow away from my world, and turns clear, cold days of reflected sunlight and red smiling cheeks into dreary gray days of bone-chilling humidity and dirty mud tracked everywhere.  In the winter, you can go sledding and ice skating; in the fall, you can play football and have bonfires; in the summer, you can go swimming and picnicking. In the spring, you can just do your best to avoid the mud.  At least, that's how I feel about it.  I miss spring in Texas, when the world begins to blossom in March, and I'm on hands and knees planting a garden in the fresh dirt surrounded by flowering trees.  March in Illinois is just dreary and wet.

Yet, the snow must melt. The rain must fall. And the mud must mix into the sub-soil.  Because when it does, and the dirty job of spring is done, everything turns green, flowers bloom, and birds sing.  Baby animals frolic in tender pasture, and people shed layers of clothing for the freedom of a t-shirt and jeans.  And color is everywhere.

I love the beauty of individual snowflakes and of millions of snowflakes combined in a drift.  I love the wildness of stark trees against white snow and blue sky.  I love seeing my favorite constellation, Orion, drift lazily above me, and I love gazing at the bright, colorful diamond-star Sirius.  I love feeling the cold air tingle on my cheeks and turn them red, then coming inside and shaking the snow off and curling up with a cup of hot chocolate and a blanket in front of a fire.

But I love June, as well, with her fully green trees and perfect 70's temperatures.  I love the strobes and crashes of an intense summer thunderstorm that comes and goes in the space of 20 minutes. I love racing across cool water, balancing on two long, thin boards and feeling water droplets fall off my body.  I love being outside every day and seeing something new each day.  Winter has its time, and so does summer, but it's not possible without painful spring.

I go through seasons of spring in my life, as well. I'm in one of those seasons right now. I enjoyed the season of college life and even had it extended as my husband finished his degree and we lived on campus.  Next we hope is the season of being settled somewhere and staying at home, raising our kids while my husband works.  I look forward to homeschooling.  But right now is that dreary in-between time.  It's been 6 months since my husband graduated, and he is still searching for a job.  We have been blessed with the gift of a roof over our heads, food in our bellies, and occasional part-time work, but bills stack up and the baby gets older and we would love to be on our own.  But I am learning, in this time, to trust God more, and He is maturing me beyond the college stage.  (and, I have to say, in spite of the stress of being unemployed, we have truly enjoyed our time staying with my parents; it has also been a period of relaxation after the stress of working & going to college & being involved in much at college)

God is also teaching me to enjoy each stage and not look forward to the future so much that I miss what is happening now.  So I am doing that with this spring in my life, enjoying the time with my parents and Jordan's parents and enjoying our baby while she is still a baby, and I will even do that with the spring that will happen in about a month outside.  I will avoid the mud, but I will also look for the seedlings poking their heads above the muck, bringing life to the grey world.

Friday, February 1, 2013

Engaging in Encouragement: 14 Easy, Everday Ideas



{yes, I love alliteration!} Encouraging others has been on my heart a lot lately.  I’m not usually very intentional about encouragement, and I would really like to be a much better encourager.  It makes my day when someone—friend, family member, stick-in-the-mud—encourages me out of the blue, and it really isn’t that difficult to do.  So why am I not going around trying to help others have better days when it’s an easy thing?

I decided to compile a list of ways I can encourage someone.  Hopefully it will help me remember much more often to take the few minutes to do something unexpected and nice.

  • Write a card – it can even be anonymous, if you don’t want to put pressure on the recipient to respond. Make it a get-well card if the person is sick, or just write a favorite verse with “You are a {insert adjective} person!”


  • Send a verse to someone’s Facebook wall, Twitter, or via private message.


  • Clean something when you’re at a family member or close friend’s house, without being asked by that person. (If you babysit, leave the house cleaner than when you arrived)


  • Tell someone you missed them at the last {small group meeting/church service/MOPS/etc.} (via FB, text, in person, etc.)


  • If someone has just moved in next door, leave an anonymous bag or two of basic groceries on their doorstep. This happened to us when we first got married and moved into our first apartment, and let me tell you, it MADE our day/week/month!  To this day I do not know who left it there, although I have a few wild guesses.  But it helped us out so much and made us feel very welcome.


  • Bake an extra batch of cookies or an extra loaf of bread and give it away.


  • Give something of yours away – a book, a movie, a piece of clothing.  Or let someone borrow something, and when they attempt to give it back, tell them to keep it.


  • Practice hospitality and invite someone (or someones) over, even if just for coffee.  Your house doesn’t have to be spotless, because, chances are, their house isn’t spotless, either. I actually feel more comfortable in a not-spotless house, because then it feels more like home.


  • Give a hearty hug.


  • Ask how you can pray for that person and pray with them (this is also great for people you’ve just met – the waitress who happens to be wearing the same headband as you, the person seated next to you on the airplane, the elderly resident at the nursing home who rooms with your grandparent).


  • Pay for the food the person in the drive-thru behind you ordered.


  • Start a conversation with the shyest person in the room standing by herself.


  • Compliment someone on some part of their character (clothing compliments are nice, but a dime a dozen. Compliments on character, such as, “You are always smiling, and it cheers up the room,” or “You have such a servant heart. I can tell you really seek to serve God through serving others” are so much more powerful).


  • Hold the door open for the mom with a baby, the mom with 4 kids, or the mom-to-be who is spending all her energy just getting up to the door.


There are hundreds, thousands, more ways to encourage others.  Look for ways each day you can encourage someone around you.

What are some ways you have encouraged others or others have encouraged you?